Children are products from Reject Shop. They aren't perfect.

I would like to think (if merely thinking means denying)that I am not a family person. It is not easy to live a life under same roof with me. I am not a pleasant presence.

No matter how much I agree and support to filial peity, I think (means I am denying, again) that I am not a good daughter. Cos I can't seems to enjoy family life. I'd rather be alone most of the time, I almost wanted to say all the time. Undoubtedly there are those lonely times when I know nothing beats daddy's jokes or mom's cooking. Or even better, their unconditional love and concern with no bounderies. They are real flesh and blood. They are not (supposed) to be hypocrites. They are the only species that spreads unlimited aura of tender love and care.

Fingers crossed. I have never think that my parents doesn't love me. I know of the sacrifices and accomodation they have provided to me all these years. There's nothing wrong with them. It's ME. ME. ME. ME.

I want to have total silence when I needed to. And I can't tell them to shut up. I want to lie on the bed real bad. And I can't seems to forget they are waiting for me to brunch. I want to have some "thrills" in life. And I can't bear those worrying looks they are gonna have on their faces. I can't even handle heart attacks, anyway..So no....I can't be the one I want to be all the time cos I am staying with my family.

Unless if I am NOT staying with them, physically. Unless if I can't go distance, but yet am blessed with all the chances to be with them at those needed times, never afraid to regret should I be a little too late. Unless if I can pretend I don't love my parents at all. Unless....there's nothing less.

This is all so crap, you know. How's this smells different from bull's shit? Maybe he is right. I am a bad attitude person. I have bad temper. I am not easy to live with.

Why I care? Take it or leave it.