My Alibi

I thought I could stop waiting
never realize my mind is betraying
I thought I could stop thinking
never know my imagination is rolling

This is not good, for us
I can't stop the rain
You can't ease my pain

We've been through oh so much
how do I tell you I'm really sorry
this time
I'm not worthy, to the least
to a man like you
Don't, please
remember all the promises
hopes and dreams
There isn't a future, to the least
to a woman like me

I may have loved you too much
that I choose to hurt you now
rather than this
shall never end with lies
shall never begin with love
Yet another.....
and another story of us

Confession is something I don't do often. I think it is difficult to be expressive verbally, because I always cannot find the right word to represent my feelings. When I pen down My Alibi, a sense of guilt over-whelmed me. I never felt so relieved ever. It felt like I'm finally leaving hell of fires migrating to the land of peacefulness. I've learned to enjoy guilt at last. A form of energy telling me that I'm too like anyone else - I have the right to be wrong. I have the strength to say I'm sorry and start all over again. I have the dignity to tell myself things can start all over again.

Six years had passed. Looking back, I've questioned myself countless times if I ever regretted to write him My Alibi. But a hush of soft wind tells me now....Let go girl, you have always wanted to be free....